20 April 2008

Finished: Condom Cozy

Jeez, I suck at blogging these days, huh? Sorry about that. At least I have a FO to show off this time! It requires a little introduction...

My favorite comedian is a Brit named Eddie Izzard. In one of his shows he does a bit about the performer Engelbert Humperdink. (You can watch it here [it starts around 6:15].) It's the first thing I think of when I'm trying to come up with a name, and I'm thrilled that I was finally able to use it!

And Engelbert Humperdink, yes, he was nice. That's not his real name. He's from Britain, but that's not his name. There's very few Humperdinks in Britain. He was born Gerry Dorsey, and not Engelbert Humperdink. His parents were not Mr. and Mrs. Humperdink. They never said, "what shall we call our son so he does not get the shit kicked out of him at school?" "We shall call him Engelbert!" "Good, that'll work!" No, his name was Gerry Dorsey, and he released songs as Gerry Dorsey... songs such as [mumble]... which didn't work, 'cause no one could hear what he was saying, and then his managers obviously said, "we're gonna change your name, Gerry! It's the name that's the problem!" And his name changed from Gerry Dorsey to Engelbert Humperdink! I mean, I just wanted to be in the room when they were working that one through.

"Zinglebert Bembeldack! Yingeybert Dungleban! Zanglebert Bingledack! Winglebert Humptyback! Slut Bunwalla!" "What?!?" "Alright, Kringlebert Fisteybuns! Steeviebuns Buttricktrundles!" "No, Gerry Dorsey! I like Gerry Dorsey!" "No, we... what've we got? Zinglebert Bembeldack, Tringlebert Wangledack, Slut Bunwalla, Clingeybun Fistlebars, Dindlebert Zendeldack, uh, Gerry Dorsey, um, Engelbert Humpteyback, Zinglebert Bengeldack, Engelbert Humperdink, Binglebert Wingledank..." "No, no, go back one, go back one! Engelbert Humperdink! That's it!"


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Allow me to introduce Slut Bunwalla. He would have been Zinglebert Bembeldack, but I thought Slut Bunwalla fit his function a little better... he's a condom and vibrator cozy. I adapted the "Condom Critter" pattern from Naughty Needles... and by "adapted" I mean I looked at the picture, skimmed the pattern, and said, "okay, I'm going to wing it."

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He has a pocket on his back for the condoms (and extra batteries). The pattern puts the pocket on the front, but I wanted it to be a little more discreet.

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There's a pouch inside for the vibrator!

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His legs are the drawstrings for the pouch.

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His eyes and beak are needle-felted with scrap yarn and sewn on.

He was a fun knit, and used up some novelty yarn that I was beginning to think I'd never find a use for.

2 comments:

Alli said...

I LOVE IT! Not to mention Slut Bunwalla is the name that always gets Mike and me giggling when we do that scene.

We keep our goodies in the boring nightstand...but maybe I should have a little Condom Critter for travel purposes...

Deenz said...

LOL - that's awesome AND it's cute!